A manager at the only comedy club in Iceland, Dan Zerin found what he says a fun way to raise awareness about Tourette syndrome, a disorder where he began noticing having symptoms since he was a kid. Feeling like what he calls a “freak,” Dan says he didn’t know exactly what was going on with him until he was finally diagnosed in his early twenties.  Struggling with depression and thoughts of suicide, Dan found comedy as his salvation. He eventually came to the realization that the source of his pain was actually great comedic content.  Today, he’s co-creator and manager of My Voices Have Tourette’s, a group of comedians with various disorders and syndromes, who raise awareness about them in a fun way.  (Photo credit: Vilborg Happy)

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Kathy:                   So we’re here talking with Dan Zirin. First of all, Dan, where are you from and where do you live now?

Dan:                      Uh, well I, uh, I moved here. I moved to Iceland from Los Angeles, so almost four years ago.

Kathy:                   Okay. So what you took you to Iceland?

Dan:                      Oh, I just love wearing a jacket in the summertime.

Kathy:                   Well, I guess you went to the right place. All right, well, you have an interesting story. I understand that you have Tourette syndrome, is that correct?

Dan:                      Yup, that’s, that’s my. Every once in a while I got, I kind of sound like a dog’s squeaky toy.

Kathy:                   Can you explain what is Tourette syndrome and how does it affect you personally?

Dan:                      Yeah. So, so basically, um, uh, the, first of all, this is the fun thing about having Tourette syndrome when I was, when I talk about it, like my techs happened a bit, a bit more. So normally I don’t sound this much like I’m going through puberty, but basically, Whoa, what Tourette syndrome is, is it’s a, uh, it’s a syndrome that involves tics, which are involuntary motions. That can be any. Basically anything that people do could theoretically be a tic. Uh, so, so like for me, I have a tic where my hand shakes a lot. Uh, my, my voice does not, it does tend to crack a, I have motions were like my head will turn to the side a little bit and kind of lock in place. It’s a and there’s, there’s a whole, it’s actually a fascinating sense syndrome because there’s more than just the ones that people can see. Uh, I also have internal ones including kind of like muscle tensions and also thought tics or mental tics as I call them. Uh, so like intrusive thoughts happening at random times without any warning, things like that.

Kathy:                   Now those intrusive thoughts, do you verbalize them or is it just your thought?

Dan:                      Um, sometimes, uh, I mean the only ones that I would verbalize. I’ve talked about this in my show at, at like a, every once in a while I have this, this tic where like when I’m reading words that end in like rl sounds or similar sounds also like, uh, oh no, it’s going to happen in my head, but I as soon as I say this, but sometimes, uh, when I, when I see words with z’s, which is great that my last name has one. Those sounds I, I repeat over and over again in my head. Um, and sometimes it’ll be out loud. So like, uh, I was, I remember I was working, I was like, we were talking before this, you mentioned that about me being a musician. I, uh, I used to do audio, like audio work and stuff, editing and all that and uh, I would, I would have files that ended with, with more sub and then I’d be sitting here basically going like repeating the sound over and over again.

Dan:                      So like the hard consonants. Uh, I, sometimes I repeat them over and over again, but mostly it’s just in my head.

Kathy:                   Mostly just in your head. Okay. I imagine that would be hard to concentrate if you’re going through this repeating mode.

Dan:                      It can be. Yes.

Kathy:                   Well, let’s talk about what was it like growing up? I mean, did you always have it or did it develop? How did, how did it affect you?

Dan:                      Well, I mean, so the earliest that I remember having Tourette’s was probably when I was about eight or 10 years old, was when I first started getting tics. Uh, at that time it was, it was pretty much just mostly facial tics. Like I had, um, like eye rolling and stuff like that. Of course my mom was very upset because she thought I was just being rude, but….

Kathy:                   Oh really? She just thought you were intentionally doing that.

Dan:                      She thought I was just always rolling my eyes at her and she was like, stop rolling your eyes. And I’m like, I’m rolling my eyes? It was, it was kind of like a Mel Brooks movie.

Kathy:                   What are you talking about, mom?

Dan:                      But the, the first, the first that I remember like having an issue with it really was when, when I was in middle school, uh, this was probably six or so, probably sixth grade, I was taking an exam in class and I had a, a humming tic where I would kind of be like, hm hm. And, uh, and I, I was doing that like during the exam and the kid next to me kept telling me to stop humming. But I had, I had no idea what was going on because I actually was not diagnosed with Tourette syndrome until, until I was around 20 or 21 years old.

Dan:                      Oh Wow. Yeah. And so, so for me, like all those years growing up, I just kind of, I just never knew what was going on. I just, I just, just, I mean I was aware of it, but I was, I just felt really embarrassed because I didn’t know what it was. And, uh, so, so I mean, I mean, what, what I did with it was a very, very common thing with Tourette syndrome is basically I tried to suppress my tics, which involves basically like with mostly the vocal tics because I didn’t really have a lot of, it was mostly the vocal tics that I had when I was younger and so I would basically tense the muscles in my neck and around my shoulders and uh, it, it would basically caused the vocal tics to be quieter because of all the, because of all that, that tension in my muscles. But the problem is that, that causes a lot of pain. So after a while it did lead to even more issues. Uh, so, so it’s not, it’s definitely not a recommended thing. But, uh, it’s, I think being that it’s so hard when you’re a kid and especially when you don’t know what’s going on, you kind of feel like you don’t have any other options.

Kathy:                   I can’t even imagine being a teenager and going through this and not, especially not having been diagnosed at that point yet. Your mom, I guess probably didn’t understand what was going on with you either. How did it affect you personally as far as emotionally dealing this as a kid? Not knowing what was going on in, but realizing that you are a little bit different, say, from the other kids?

Dan:                      Well, I mean, I think the, I think the thing is the, the biggest thing for me is just, you know, because I didn’t know know what it was and I didn’t know what was going on. I mean I basically, I started feeling like I was a bit of a freak when I was, uh, when I was in, when it started getting more and more. And uh, I basically, I, I started getting, it was very weird. I started getting a very antisocial. Like I, I, I was kind of afraid to be around people, but at the same time I was very social because I wanted to be around people. So, so it caused, it caused a very interesting thing with that. But it just, most of it was just feelings of embarrassment. I felt like, oh, like I didn’t entirely fit in and I mean I just wanted to figure out how to stop it was the, the, you know, the main thing.

Dan:                      But what’s fascinating about, about all this is that, you know, I talk about my experiences growing up with this, but, you know, I’ve talked to, to friends that I’ve known my whole life and because of all the suppression that I did, none of them actually noticed under until I actually started being very open about it. And then they were like, oh yeah, I just, I never even noticed that until now. And, uh, it’s, it’s kind of, kind of something that’s been. Yeah, it’s, it’s very fascinating to me that no one ever noticed. But at the same time, like I had this, I had this thought, I was on a. I was a. because I never realized how much suppression I actually did until one day when I was on a date with a girl. And uh, I noticed that every time she was looking at me, it was like my, my tics were all under control, but the moment she turned her head and looked away, all of them happened at once. And I, I, I felt like, like one of those dolls that has the button on the bottom that you push it and it just like collapses. And uh, it was, I imagine it was probably hilarious to watch.

Kathy:                   I just imagine, you know, its sort’ve like when you’re trying to hold in a sneeze and the longer you hold it in, the louder it is when it finally does get released or …..

Dan:                      Oh yeah. Well in this. But this is actually, I mean this, this, and this is one thing that, you know, I like bringing this up when people talk about Tourette syndrome because it’s a very uh. Like I remember I was talking to a friend of mine here in Iceland a couple of years ago about this, about the suppression. And he was very confused because, you know, I mean with Tourette syndrome, mo, I mean, no one really knows a lot about it. And, and, uh, the only thing that we’re, that people are really told is that it’s something that you simply can’t control, which, which is true, but, but I think it’s important to, to comment that, uh, one of the things I’ve been thinking about a lot in the past few months really is that there are kind of two different types of tics. I mean, there’s a lot of different kinds of tics, but they all fall into kind of two categories.

Dan:                      The first one is like kind of a unconscious tics, which basically means that they’re one, like with my hand shaking, for example, I, I just, I don’t know when that’s gonna happen. Sometimes I don’t even know what’s happening. It just happens. So if I were to, if I were to try to suppress that, the only thing I could really do would be to basically hold my hand when it’s happening. Uh, but in terms of the other ones, then there’s the conscious tics. So, and uh, like a friend of mine who also has Tourette syndrome, who’s also in the show with me, one of the people I started with, she was saying that she feels that Tourette syndrome is kind of like, oh, like a form of OCD in a, in a sense. And I think it really works with this, with this theory that I have about conscious tics because there’s a lot of times where a lot of us will have these, these tics that it’s almost like we feel insanely uncomfortable if we don’t do them, but technically we could try to not do them.

Dan:                      So, so, so like for example, with, with my vocal tics every once in a while, like I, I have like a squeak that I do. Like, it’s like that kind of thing and know. And I’ve, I’ve, I’ve, I’ve had a lot of times where I actually don’t feel that I kind of like, like I’m being forced to do it, but it just feels so uncomfortable for me not to do it, that I do it. So that’s why when I was, when I was tensing the muscles, I knew when it was going to happen now and I knew I was going to feel so incredibly uncomfortable if I didn’t do it, that that’s when I kind of get a little bit of preparation for it.

Kathy:                   So I’m curious because you’re also a musician and, and you sing as well, is that right?

Dan:                      I, I, I, I did do that for a while. Yes.

Kathy:                   Oh, okay. So, so how does that affect you when you’re singing or does it?

Dan:                      So, huh. So what’s funny about that is, uh, uh, Oh man, I love that. I love, I love that I’m one of these people where it’s like, I get, I get a question that should probably be like a two second answer, but I always think find a way to make it a two hour answer. Basically. Uh, so when I, when I was, uh, when I left high school, I graduated high school and I went to western Michigan University for opera. And the thing is, because of all the suppression that I was doing, it was actually putting so much strain on my vocal, on my, uh, my, uh, vocal and my throat that I was actually damaging my voice. Oh yeah. And I, I actually, it caused a lot of issues with me and in college. Well I ended up, I ended up dropping out after the third year and I’m in, it was, it was for other reasons.

Dan:                      I, I did try to live the typical college life and not really go to class and drink a lot, but I, but, but at the same time I wasn’t really taking things as seriously as I felt I could because I didn’t feel like I could do as much as I wanted. And so I, I, I got very, very down about that and I didn’t actually sing that much, ah, after I left there I did a little bit but not much. And then recently at the club that I’m running with a couple of friends, we’ve been doing karaoke nights, but I was like, you know what? Oh, I’ll try. I’ll try it again. See, see how it works now and because I haven’t been doing, I’ve barely been doing any suppression now because I don’t like, I mean it’s like every one in Iceland knows me as the Tourette syndrome guy.

Dan:                      So, so I, I don’t really need to. Everyone just knows what I have and I noticed that because I was, I’ve been stopping the suppression. I’ve actually been able to sing a lot better.

Kathy:                   Okay. Good.

Dan:                      And uh, I mean in terms of like the vocal tics, it is kind of funny how certain things do become a little easier because my voice is used to going into high frequencies. So like, uh, I don’t know if you know the song, I believe in a thing called love by the darkness, but I, I’ve been doing that song and Karaoke and there’s some really high notes and I, a friend of mine asked me, he’s like, how do you get those high notes? And I’m like, hi, just use my tic.

Kathy:                   Yeah, now that you’ve explain it, Yeah. it’s going to be there anyway. Put it to work.

Dan:                      Exactly.

Kathy:                   That’s awesome. Okay. So what was the hardest part before, you were diagnosed, or maybe even after you were diagnosed with Tourette’s, was there an incident or a point where you’re like, man, this is too much, are driving me crazy or anything like that?

Dan:                      Uh, yeah. Well, I mean to the, I would say the, the, the heaviest tics in terms of my mental capabilities is um, there’s two tics that I get that I didn’t know for a very long time that these were actually tics. It’s basically I get depressive episodes and I get suicidal thoughts. Well, the, the depression doesn’t really hit like, it doesn’t hit very often, but when it does, it does, like, it basically can knock out an entire day for me. Uh, like when I, when I have, when I have it, it’s kind of, Oh, like my brain just like resets every. Like my whole thought process process goes uh, blank and then it’s like for, for like 30 minutes it’s like a reboot and I don’t even know that I’m going through it until about 30 minutes later. What’s fun about that is I, I’ve actually had that twice now while I’m doing standup and uh, it, so I basically forgotten everything in the span of two seconds, but luckily the second time I actually was more prepared for it.

Dan:                      But, but the thing is the, like with the suicidal thoughts, those happen very frequently for me. And so it’s, so it’s, and it’s something that I still get a, I’ve, I’ve, I’ve had both of these for somewhere between 10 and 15 years now and uh, with the suicidal thoughts, you know, I mean that’s basically something that it. Because it happens so frequently when you have that for, you know, 10 plus years and you don’t know that that’s not really how you feel. It kind of becomes difficult to not give in. And uh, but earlier in the year I, I kind of, the thing that I’ve kind of learned this year is just I have this stuff, so what am I going to do with it? If it’s not going to go away, whoa. Like, am I just going to give into it? Am I going to give it the spotlight or am I going to say how can I, you know, live with it and just recognize that it’s always going to be there. So I decided to use my love of horror movies for the suicidal thoughts when they happen. I would say 99 percent of the time I just go, oh, the movie’s starting. Okay. Who’s playing the main character? Oh, it’s me. Oh, okay. That sucks, but okay. And then I just, I basically just imagine I’m watching a horror movie that I happened to be the, the cast is the main lead and then it becomes more of entertainment instead of actual, an actual thought.

Kathy:                   Oh Wow. What a great idea. I did see some pictures of you, by the way, in facebook dressed up as a zombie.

Dan:                      I, you know, I mean, I’ve, I’ve loved horror movies for a long time. It, it, I, I think the thing that, that I love about horror movies is when you get used to seeing this stuff, it kind of makes dealing with tough things in life a little bit easier. Sure. Uh, because, because you realize it could be worse, you could have an ax going through your face in the middle of a forest, you know, it could be very worse.

Kathy:                   Right. That’s so very true. Going back to what the doctor said, did you say that no one knows what causes it?

Dan:                      Yeah. So, uh, yeah, no, no one, I mean, at least right now, it’s a lot to my knowledge, there’s not really a solid reason as to what causes it other than like a, like my friend Elva, for, for example, she has Tourette syndrome or her dad has Tourette syndrome and her son has Tourette syndrome. So it’s kind of like, it, it got passed through the family but, but with, with me, I mean, uh, I don’t know anyone in my family that’s had it. So I’m not really like a, I mean my brother has had some tics but he doesn’t have Tourette syndrome so I’m not really sure where exactly it came from. But I just remember when the, when the, when the doctor told me that I had Tourette syndrome, I was just shocked because, I mean, let’s face it, all anyone really knows about it is huh the shouting swear words and that’s all I knew until I was like 20, 21 years old. So when he told me that, I was like, that’s not what I have, but it’s definitely what I have. I had Tourette syndrome.

Kathy:                   Oh, okay. That’s true. There is a stereotype of people blurting out obscenities or cursing or I don’t know. So why is there that stereotype or I mean, is that a realistic portrayal?

Dan:                      Well, it is. It is a real tic. It’s saw, there’s actually a name for it. It’s called Coprolalia and it’s not, it’s not just swearing. So basically a Coprolalia is just the involuntary shouting uh, of words. It could be like, I, I remember reading, uh, that uh, someone was basically shouting out like, like a holy tube socks or like, you know, someone was shouting out just random words. I uh, I think, again, getting back to the what I was saying before about, you know, what Tourette syndrome kind of seeming like a form of OCD. I, ah, I kind of viewed that as, as like the tics I was saying before where like, you know, when I’m reading words and I get the sound repeating in my head. My theory of a, about it because I have had times where I’ve said it out loud, but I don’t shout it. And I think the thing is that it kind of goes along with that. I wonder, and I have never met anyone with Coprolalia, but I wonder if it’s just that they get these words that repeat so often in their head and it’s just their, their mind wants them to say it so bad that they, they feel weird if they don’t.

Kathy:                   That’s interesting. So would it be something like, um, everybody has thoughts in her head, right?

Dan:                      Yeah, yeah. I would hope so.

Kathy:                   Yeah, like, well, of course, you know, you meet somebody and they’re a total jerk. You’re thinking about it and you thinking about any thinking about it, but they just actually say it.

Dan:                      Yeah. One of my, one of my, one of my friends who’s a, who’s in the show with me, he, he had, we’ve had, we’ve had these ideas of different sketches that we, we wanted to do to kind of teach people about the, the syndromes and disorders that we have and for Tourette syndrome, he had this idea of, of like someone like kind of shouting out some swear words and someone, uh, someone else being like, what’s with him? Does he have Tourette syndrome? No, he’s just a jerk. Yeah. So I mean I have, but that’s. And that’s the thing about, you know, Tourette syndrome and it’s also, I mean with like my friend Hannah, like she’s the third person I started the show with. She has schizophrenia. I mean there are things about schizophrenia that are just absolutely fascinating and it, you know, I mean when you really dig into these syndromes in these disorders and you really whoa, like read up about them and you learn about them.

Dan:                      There are so many fascinating facets of them. Like, I mean, you know, learning, learning about, you know, how, you know, Tourette syndrome can, can affect, you know, it can be external, it could be internal tics, it could be, you know, just thoughts that happen. I mean, these are things that people don’t really think of and uh, there’s so many aspects to it that it’s just like, well, what can’t be a tic? you know, what.. Uh, and actually, um, before this thought loses my mind uh, it’s actually uh Tourette syndrome is actually a very difficult thing to diagnose to people because some of the tics actually seem like just everyday things like, um, like a lot of, a lot of children, a lot of children when they’re diagnosed around the time that they’re diagnosed, they, like, they have a cough that they do like as a tic, but a lot of doctors will see that that is, oh, maybe they have the flu, uh, with, with some people, like when they, like, some people will, will like clear the throat and they’ll be like, oh, well maybe, you know, they just have a lot of phlegm.

Dan:                      So it’s, it’s, uh, it, it can be very difficult sometimes to know if someone actually has it, uh, you know, until they start squeaking, I guess.

Kathy:                   Right. Okay. So there’s no cure for it?

Dan:                      Yeah. Uh, so that, that was one of the things that I thought that I spoke to the doctor about when I was diagnosed was so I said, okay, so, you know, it’s 2000, whatever. I don’t remember what year it was, but I was like, you know, there’s got to be a cure for this at this point because I feel like, you know, in life we just get so used to things just being available that we’re like, all right, well there’s got to be a cure by this point. But he told me that there isn’t, but there’s medication and a huh. The problem is with, and this is another fascinating thing about this, is that because of mental tics, because of thought tics and OCD and all that stuff, uh, it’s actually not uncommon that people with Tourette syndrome react strangely to medication.

Dan:                      So, so for me, I always liked bringing up this specific medication because a, a lot of people have had negative side effects with it. Uh, there’s a medication called Orap and know that that was the one that I was prescribed a for Tourette syndrome. And I remember the doctor basically was saying, so there’s, there’s two side effects that are not uncommon. Well, with it, one is you may lose your creative side. And I was like, well that’s not good, I’m a musician. And, and then, but then the other one is he said you may have symptoms similar to Parkinson’s. And I went, well that’s not ideal, but, but, uh, I, I decided to try it anyway. And I didn’t get either of those but my, but half of my face went completely numb.

Kathy:                   Oh, no.

Dan:                      And, uh, when I’ve taken, when I’ve taken antidepressants, I’ve gotten blackouts and uh, so it’s, it’s, it’s kind of a, the problem with Tourette syndrome is that a lot of people are actually, you know, like there’s a kind of a big movement to really find, not necessarily a cure but, but something simply to a lessen the, the tics I, I guess, you know, to suppress the tics in a, in a way of putting it, um, because uh, and actually what’s very popular right now is a cannabis oil.

Dan:                      Cannabis oil has basically been a very, very commonly used to kind of just like calm down the tics. But unfortunately I’ve never tried it because it’s not legal in Iceland.

Kathy:                   Oh bummer.

Dan:                      I can’t, I can’t really say for, from experience. I’ve only tried the stuff that, that makes me black out. And you know, I, I would, I have to say though, you know, if I’m getting blackouts from a medication, I just wish I had those, you know, things at like family reunions, you know, that would have been nice.

Kathy:                   You can plan it.

Dan:                      Yeah, you can plan it. It’s just like, oh, I’m going to be there. All right. Give me one pill and I’ll be. I’ll be ready to go.

Kathy:                   Yeah, that’s a good one. Right? Or jury duty, maybe? I don’t know.

Dan:                      Oh yes. So let’s,

Kathy:                   let’s talk about how did you get into comedy?

Dan:                      How did I get into comedy? Comedy is something that I’ve, I’ve wanted to try since I was a kid, but, but you know, I mean living in the states that it, there’s kind of a different vibe to it than Iceland. Because it’s been going for so long in the states, there’s a lot of negative, negativity toward, toward like open mic comedy for example. And uh, but when I was in Iceland, uh, I, it was two years ago, I was working at a, at a bar and uh, well they, they did a, an open mic once a month and I was, I was working one night and we were doing the open mic and I was like, you know, if I don’t try it when it’s at the place I’m working at, I’m not. I’m like, I’m never going to live this up. So I asked my manager, I was like, do you mind if I do a set?

Dan:                      And he was like, absolutely go for it. And uh, I just absolutely loved it. And uh, thought the host basically came to me afterward and he was like, Hey, come come, come to this other bar that we do this at. We do it every week, uh, you should, you should totally try it there. And I was like, alright. So I tried it there and it just, it was like a bug. I just, I can’t stop. I became completely addicted and uh, I mean, talking about, talking about Tourette syndrome in of a whole room of people that I don’t know is, it’s a very powerful thing, you know, I mean, getting past that, getting past the humor, just being able to stand in front of, you know, uh, I, I’ve, I mean I’ve performed in front of as much as you know, a hundred something people and I mean to, to stand in front of that many people and just be like, I have, I have Tourette syndrome. That’s why I sound like this. And everyone starts giggling and I’m like, yes, please laugh because I’ve been waiting my whole life to be able to do that myself, you know, um, to, to be able to do that. It just, it, it releases so much, like it removes almost all the embarrassment because I mean, who, who cares at that moment? It’s just you being you.

Kathy:                   So was that the very first time you went on stage to perform? Was that your content, about you having Tourette’s?

Dan:                      No, the, the, the, the first. Oh Man, what did I talk about the first set? Oh, I talked about. Well, I have long hair and a beard. So I talked about looking like Jesus.

Kathy:                   Yeah, I could see that resemblance.

Dan:                      No, I, I definitely have a lot of Jesus jokes. Um, ah, I, I, I, I don’t remember exactly what I talked about. I, but I, I think it was my third, my third or fourth set that I talked about uh Tourette syndrome. So it was actually very quick that I decided to talk about it. Like I remember, I remember when I, when I did the first set, and I know I mentioned the Tourette syndrome and I talked about the tics. I mean all of my friends came up to me afterward and they were like, dude, this was amazing. You should talk more about this. And uh, you know, I mean like to talk about things that have helped. I mean, you know what I mean. Standup has really been the most helpful thing in dealing with everything in my life. I mean, in terms of all the disorders that I have.

Dan:                      I mean I have like a whole book of disorders and talking about those. Like, I mean I remember the first time I like when I met my friend Elva, well, she was the first person I ever heard of in my life that also had Tourette syndrome and was a standup comedian and to be able to see her doing her set and just the openness she had about it. I was just like, this is awesome. I like, this is amazing. The fact that I feel this, I want others to feel this as well. And I mean, there really is, there really is something special about, you know, doing our show and having people come up to us afterward and being like, hey, you know, I also have Tourette syndrome. Thank you so much for talking about this. Do you mind if we talk for five minutes? And I’m like, let’s talk for 20. You know, I’m here, I’m here all night, let’s talk as long as you want. It’s just really powerful.

Kathy:                   That is, that’s amazing. Okay. So what would you say is the funniest part about having Tourette’s?

Dan:                      Oh, definitely my squeak. It is, it is hilarious. I mean, are you kidding me? I can’t believe I didn’t think of this earlier. Like, I mean like looking back on things that made me upset, I was like holy crap, that’s funny. Like I remember when when I was a kid, my mom does not remember this and I wish she did because it was hilarious though. There was one night where like I was in, I was in my room and like I was basically hu, hu. And I just hear my mom in the other room go, like, say to my dad, honey, I think you’re beeper’s going off. I’m like, I made. It was, it was things like that that at the time, I mean I was embarrassed and I felt really down about it. But looking back at it, I’m like, man, why did I not laugh at that?

Dan:                      And I mean, the thing is at this point, you know, basically any tech that I get, Oh, I just tried to think of the humor to it because if I don’t find the humor to it, that’s when it starts getting to me. So like with my, with my hand shaking, like there were that, there was a day where I was, I was, I was behind the bar and I was like, oh, I got to get a video of this. I put my hand on one of the, um, one of the liquor bottles and my hand was just shaking back and forth and I took a video of it. And I posted it on facebook and I said, life as a bartender with Tourette syndrome; for some reason, everyone loves it when I pour the drinks.

Kathy:                   You’re just, uh, you’re full of content.

Dan:                      Yeah, yeah. I mean, and I huh like, I, I just. That’s the thing is, you know, when, when people ask me what, why I’m so comfortable with all of this stuff. It’s just because I’ve just, I’ve found so much humor in it, that at this point, if, if I’m laughing at it and other people are laughing at it, I have nothing to worry about.

Kathy:                   No. I. And I think it’s great that the audience has such a positive feedback for you.

Dan:                      Oh yeah. I, I had, I remember there was a night where were my, it was a, it was like five. It was, I mean it was probably like 10 seconds, but it felt like like five straight minutes, just my voice cracking over and over again. There was a woman in the front row who was just laughing so hard and I, I basically stopped and I said to her, I was like, okay, you know what? I never would have done this, you know, for like 10 to 15 years of my life, but I’m doing this entire next bit just for you. And I went and I sat down right next to her and she was just laughing so hard she couldn’t stop and I was like, I was like, okay, what’s your name? And she told me her name and I was like, where are you from? And she said, Iceland and I can. I went, okay, you know what, this isn’t fun anymore. I’m going back on stage. See you later.

Kathy:                   That was it.

Dan:                      That was, that was it. But I looked at her and I said, I said, do yourself a favor. Every time I squeak, feel free to laugh because it is funny.

Kathy:                   Well, I understand that the end of the comedy sessions that you give the audience a chance to ask you questions about Tourette’s. What was either the funniest or most unusual question that you got?

Dan:                      Um, probably I got a question about how I feel about Brexit. That’s the problem with telling people that they can ask us about anything. But uh, I, I got uh, well, I mean, I, I don’t know. I don’t know who’s, who, you know, what age group are listening to this podcast. I did get asked if it affected sex, um, which, uh, no it has not. I, I did get asked. I don’t know. Usually the thing is what I love about the q and a’s that usually people ask us really, really cool questions. So I mean most of the, like most of the things that you would imagine, you know, like, you know, how, how’d you guys meet? How has standup affected your views on your, your, you know, syndromes and disorders, things like that. I wouldn’t say we’ve really ever gotten anything that was terribly funny other than just us being, you know, goofy, silly people and we joke about them. But we actually uh to give you a little bit of insider knowledge of.

Dan:                      uh, we’re actually debating cutting that part from the show because we’re actually discussing starting up a podcast for the show.

Kathy:                   Oh really?

Dan:                      Yeah. And the podcast is basically going to be what we’ll invite people for from online, from, you know, in person at the end of our shows a we’ll say, you know, whatever questions you guys have, send them into us and we’ll do a whole episode answering as many questions as we can. It’ll probably be only like two questions at a time because we do talk a lot, but we. The main thing is we wo, we feel that doing it in a podcast format instead of on stage in front of an audience will be better because that way we can simply be like the way we are out in the wild. We can be the, the goofy yet serious people that we are and we can answer them the way that we actually naturally would. So you get us exactly as we are.

Kathy:                   Right, right. No, I think that’s a fantastic idea. I’m looking forward to hearing it when it comes out. Do you have a name for your podcast yet?

Dan:                      So the problem that we have is that every name that we come up with this too long. I mean, My Voices Have Tourette’s is already too long of a name, but we’re not getting rid of it. Uh, so we just decided to go further and make it longer and it’ll be, it’ll be My Voices Have Tourette’s and Other Stuff as Well.

Kathy:                   Right. You don’t want to limit yourself, right?

Dan:                      No. Like my friend, Þórhallur, uh, he wanted it to be My Voices Have Tourette’s and That’s Why I Have Autism and Anxiety and Other Stuff.

Kathy:                   It’s all good.

Dan:                      So who knows?

Kathy:                   That’s going to be a lot of fun. I can’t wait.

Dan:                      Oh, it is. It’s, it’s we, we did one test run and it was phenomenal. It was hilarious and so much fun.

Kathy:                   So do you have an ETA or estimated when this is going to be released?

Dan:                      Um, we’re hoping. I’m hoping to start it off before the end of this year. So, uh, but we’re just, we’re just kinda waiting on a couple of, a couple of details and then we’ll, we’ll start up. The latest will probably be the beginning of next year.

Kathy:                   Okay, terrific. We’ll keep our eyes open for that. So Dan, let me ask you, if there’s anyone out there listening who perhaps maybe has Tourette’s, what words of encouragement would you like to share with them?

Dan:                      Um, you know what, I’m, I’m, I’m, uh, I’m going to take this, this opportunity. Uh, I don’t know why. I don’t know why I keep doing this. Like an, like a new, like a forties news guy, transatlantic voice. I’m going to take this opportunity to talk about…. No, no, alright. There is, there is one thing I actually, I, I’ve been, I’ve been saying this a lot lately and I really think it’s important is not necessarily in terms of encouragement but just something to think about because they’re, you know, with pc culture though, there’s a big movement right now to try to get people to stop saying that people suffer from Tourette syndrome, schizophrenia, whatever it is they have. They want people to stop saying suffering and say living. And I actually, I, until this year, I would not say that what I was doing was living with Tourette syndrome.

Dan:                      I would say I was suffering with it because of the both mental and physical pain. And I don’t think it’s a bad thing to admit that and I don’t think it’s a bad thing to acknowledge that I think it’s actually important. And the reason why, like now I’ll say I, I, I live with Tourette’s. I don’t suffer well every, once in awhile as, as everyone suffers from life in general. But I would say I live with it now. But I think understanding, understanding the suffering and under understanding the pain that I’ve had from Tourette syndrome and OCD, panic disorder, you know, all these things that I have, I understanding that, that, that pain and that suffering is actually why I, I say that I’m living with it now. It’s why I’m comfortable with it. It’s why I’m so open. Why I go in front of, you know, a, a full room of people every week and say everything that’s on my mind about it is because is because of that suffering and pain. So I think it’s just, it’s very important to understand, uh, your own individual journey and instead of, instead of trying to mask it with, with something nice and friendly sounding, understand what it is and figure out where you want to go with it.

Kathy:                   And figure out where you want to go with it.

Dan:                      Exactly.

Kathy:                   Okay, great. Going back to My Voices Have Tourettes…

Dan:                      Oh, yours do too? Fascinating.

Kathy:                   Who knew, right? Okay. So what is My Voices Have Tourette’s and how did it get started?

Dan:                      So basically my, My Voices Have Tourette’s is a stand up show that me, myself, my friends Elva and Hannah. Uh, we started this as a show for the Fringe Festival that started for the first time in Iceland last, or just this past July. It was a show that we wanted to do. Basically it’s a standup show of us just doing material about our disorders and syndromes and just being as open and free about as possible and making kind of a cool awareness type standup show. Um, but it’s, it’s basically grown to a, just a stand up show that features comedians with disorders and syndromes as a way of raising awareness in a fun way. So, so, um, Hannah unfortunately moved to Scotland like, like a jerk, but she is, she’s still very much a part of this. When we do the podcast huh, we are going to include her in that and uh, I’ll get to this in a minute but, but we are planning on touring with the show next year and she will be a part of that.

Dan:                      So Elva and I have Tourette syndrome. Hannah has schizophrenia and then we also have a, my friend Þórhallur performs with us. He has anxiety and my friend Carmela has autism. We call ourselves the main five and then we have, uh, my friend, uh, Stefan [sp?] who performs with us right now. He, we’re basically building a second team right now and he is kind of the lead of that one. And he talks about also having autism, but he mostly talks about having bipolar disorder. And uh, my friend Joseph has also been on the show to talk about depression and addiction and insomnia.

Kathy:                   What a great idea. It was this your brain child?

Dan:                      Yeah. I mean, I, I started this mostly as a, I, I didn’t feel I was getting enough opportunities in stand up, which I realize now is silly because I was getting a lot of opportunities. But, but I really wanted to perform in the, in the festival uh, because I’ve never done that before. And I just really, I actually just really wanted to do a show with Elva because I thought two people with Tourette syndrome doing comedy together would be really fun. But then I thought it would be really great to include Hannah to get kind of the diversity and, and get, you know, us talking about more things and it’s just, it’s evolved in such a way that’s unbelievable. And I mean, I mean, it’s, it. I mean, I would, I would agree that, you know, it started from a thought that I had, but it really is, you know, I, I really say it’s all of our, our project. I, I don’t say it’s my project, even though I do say it’s my project because I’m egotistical and I love to talk about myself.

Kathy:                   Hey, well someone’s got to, right?

Dan:                      Someone’s got to. I mean, hey, you know what, if you’re an awesome person and you know it, clap your hands. Like you know, it’s just, just at some point you got to realize you’re pretty cool.

Kathy:                   That’s right. So I take it you didn’t get any participation trophies, you got the championship trophy.

Dan:                      Oh No, I got, I, I got the, I got the participation trophy and I was the one going, man, I, I, I mean thank you, but I don’t deserve this. I need to win. The thing is I’m not really, I’m not really that much of an egotistical person. It’s just uh, like when, when you go through so much of your life, like trying to put yourself down all the time and then you finally start feeling better about yourself. You know, you gotTa, you gotTa, you gotTa let live a little bit.

Kathy:                   Absolutely. I totally agree. All right, so what is next for your group? For My Voices Have Tourette’s. So what, what do you guys have planned?

Dan:                      So then, alright. So the soonest thing that we’re going to do, we actually just put up some merchandise online, that is. That’s a new thing that we’re doing. We’re going to do the podcast soon, but, but next summer we’re planning to go on tour in the United States and that is basically going to be the start of our travels. So far we’ve only performed in Iceland but, but we’re gonna we’re, we’re, we’re gonna plan this, we’re going to get this all altogether and then we’re going to do some shows in the states. I already have people that are interested in us in New York and Los Angeles and we’ve got a lot of people asking for us in other states. So we, we, we have all the contacts, we’re just getting the finishing touches on the press kit. That’s great. Yeah. So, so that is, that’s kind of the biggest thing that we’re planning. And then of course doing the Fringe Festival again next year, but we really want to focus on, uh, on the US tour. And then after that, after that, I would like to go to Europe and anywhere else that will have us, we’re all terrified of spiders as we should be, but we do want to go to Australia at some point as well.

Kathy:                   Yeah, they do have spiders, right?

Dan:                      Yeah. They’ve got, they’ve got other things as well. But let’s focus on the spiders, you know, they’re terrifying.

Kathy:                   Okay. So is it true that you manage the only comedy club in Iceland?

Dan:                      I do. Well, I, I mean I am one of, I am one of technically three managers, but, but we like to say, uh, I like to describe it as a. me and my friend are the managers. My friend is the owner. He’s the one that started it. And uh, my friend is also an owner, but it’s mostly [?] and I that run the bar. And. No. And yes it is the, I always go through this. I’m not, I’m just going to say it. Uh, so technically we are not the first comedy club in Iceland because there was one other place that tried. It was, it was a bar that had comedy nights, but you know what, screw them. We’re the first and only comedy club in Iceland and we, we just, we actually just started back in May you had to tell you how new. Well, like comedy itself is not new to Iceland but, but the, the open mic scene is definitely only a few years old in just a few years, but Iceland has gone from basically like maybe five people doing an open mic to a about 30 of us that are, that are pretty, you know, regularly performing. So it’s uh, it’s really grown in just a few years.

Kathy:                   That’s great. And what’s the name of the club?

Dan:                      Uh, it’s called the Secret Celler, but don’t tell anyone because it’s apparently a secrete.

Kathy:                   So nobody go to the Secret Celler.

Dan:                      Shh! What did I just say? What did I just say?.

Kathy:                   Okay. So we talked about a lot of different stuff. Is there anything else that you’d like to share with the listeners that we haven’t spoken about?

Dan:                      Um, I mean, uh, uh, I don’t know. The weather outside is pretty, pretty awful. Um…

Kathy:                   Okay, when’s the best time to go to Iceland?

Dan:                      Uh, there isn’t. Um, no, I would, I would say the best time of year to go to Iceland. It, there’s two times. I would say probably like, like August because that’s kind of like the peak of our summer and uh, it’s, it’s, it’s basically 24 hours of sunlight in the summer and then in the wintertime it’s the opposite. So right now we’re on hour, like two of the light here and uh, we’ll probably lose it in a couple hours here. Uh, I would also say new year’s is also one of my favorite times a year because, I mean everyone buys fireworks here, so, so at midnight you just go anywhere in Reykjavik and you just look in all directions and you see fireworks. It is absolutely stunning and I mean the northern lights is definitely an experience.

Kathy:                   That sounds beautiful. Well, if anybody who goes, make sure to stop by and see Dan at the Secret Celler.

Dan:                      Yeah. Every Thursday.

Kathy:                   Every Thursday. Okay, good. And so if people have questions or when I find out more about you, where can they go?

Dan:                      All right, let’s see how many of these I can do. All right, so hold on a second. Let me catch my breath. I love that. I can actually do this. That’s why. That’s why act so a narcissistic about it. All right. So, uh, you can find us at Mvhtshow.com. That’s Mvh t like my voice does have tourette’s. Mvhtshow.com is our website. We also have, we also have facebook and instagram @myvoiceshavetourettes, one word. We have a twitter. I don’t know why because no one in Iceland uses twitter, but I have it just in case that one is @Mvhtshow. I also, I also have my own facebook page. Uh, @DanZerinPage. On instagram. I’m @DanZerinComedy. For uh, the, the, the comedy club, we have a facebook. It’s SecretCellerRVK. On instagram. I believe it’s Secret underscore celler underscore rvk.

Dan:                      Uh, and then we have the SecretCeller.is is our website and if you want to find a, if you want to buy one of our merchandise. Whoa. We have mugs and we have t shirts for My Voices Have Tourette’s. Uh, you can find that at. It’s a Redbubble.com/people/VivaIceland. That’s my, uh, that’s my clothing store that I have and you can find all the clothing that I’ve designed, including the, My Voices Have Tourette’s as well.

Kathy:                   Is that it?

Dan:                      uh, if there’s anything else you can go on Google and type my name or type My Voices Have Tourette’s…

Kathy:                   No, I’m just joking.

Dan:                      I love that I, I spent this entire interview just being so humble being so, you know, just so genuine. And now I’m just like, look at me, look at me, look at me.

Kathy:                   Well Dan, I really appreciate your time and thank you so much for turning your Tourette syndrome into something fun to learn about and educating people about it.

Dan:                      Yeah. And, and thank you for turning this cafe into a inspiration. I, I had no idea we were in a cafe right now, but you know, it’s, it’s a very nice location.

Kathy:                   Thank you. It’s the best. It’s the best.

Dan:                      Yeah. I mean, as as, as we say, the, the, you know, the rug really ties the room together. It looks very nice right now.

Kathy:                   Okay, Dan. Well thank you so much and I look forward to hearing all about the new podcast when it comes out too.

Dan:                      Yeah. Thank you very much for having me. This has been a lot of fun.

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